Thoughts on an Anniversary and a Birthday

10 Jun


I would feel remiss if I did not write a post today for my lovely wife.  You see, today is our seventh anniversary.  But, this is only part of the story, the whole of which I do not have the time, nor the space to write about here.

My wife and I have known each other practically forever.  Okay, not quite forever, but since we were children anyway.

The first memory I have of her was at church.  We are from the same town and we attended the same school and church growing up.  I remember this little white headed girl (she is a natural blonde) standing up on the stage singing.  She forgot a word or two, started tearing up, finished the song and as soon as the music ended went rushing down from the stage, to her parents, slumping down in a mush of embarrassment.

I remember looking up to my mother and asking, Who is that girl?

I remember thinking, what is she so upset about?  Why is she crying?  What did she do wrong?  It seemed okay to me.  What’s her problem?

Most of these questions I have asked thousands of times since in all sorts of different settings and scenarios.  And like then, I usually walk away without a firm answer!

She is an amazing woman.  A caring mother.  And a devoted spouse.  She is my soul-mate and the love of my life.

When I was young I loved only one girl and it was her.  When I was a teen, I loved only one and it was her.  When I became a man, I loved only one woman and it is her.  I have only ever loved one and it has always been her.

I guess I get that from my Nanny.  Nanny’s philosophy was once you found your soul-mate, there was no sense looking for anyone else.  She found hers.  And I found mine.

To this day, I still find myself asking, who is that girl?

Amber, I love you.  And I will forever be yours.


One last word, today is also my paternal grandmother’s birthday.  I called her Grandmother Betty.  She has been dead for many years now.  I still miss her.  I was ten or so when she died; it was the first time I experienced a broken heart.

She died much too young (in her fifties).  She was aged beyond her years by the debilitating effects of rheumatoid arthritis.  I remember her fingers bent and twisted; misshapen and unable to extend and flex.  Her back slumped.  Her knees swollen.  But, at least in my memories, she always smiled.

I try not to think of her often, it still hurts and I still miss her terribly.  I find myself very emotional even writing this.  She was, like my Nanny, a courageous and fierce woman.  Now that I think about it, all the women in my family are strong women.  I have never known a weak woman.  And I think I am a better man for it.

I am grateful, that though she was pained in her body on this earth, she has now, for these many years, been running, leaping and dancing in heaven.

It will be amazing for me to see her again one day, young and fresh and full of life.

So, Happy Birthday Grandmother Betty, I love you and miss you.  I can’t wait to see you again!


Posted by on June 10, 2013 in Grace in the Everyday


Tags: , , , ,

5 responses to “Thoughts on an Anniversary and a Birthday

  1. Cinnwriter

    June 11, 2013 at 10:53 am

    Thanks for sharing these insights into your life.

    • Timothy Murray

      June 11, 2013 at 10:55 am

      No problem. I enjoyed doing it.

      • Cinnwriter

        June 11, 2013 at 11:30 am

        Oh…and Happy Anniversary!! To both of you.

      • Timothy Murray

        June 11, 2013 at 2:21 pm

        Yes, thank you very much.

  2. Beth Murray

    July 23, 2013 at 9:43 am

    One day you will have to write the book about you and Amber, there is no way to write a simple story. As for Grandmother Betty, you brought a much needed light into her life. She loved you so fiercely!! By the time the others came along she was too crippled to take care of them as she did you!! She was never just a mother-in-law to me, she was a wonderful 2nd mother.


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