Bam the Gam Answers a Hypothetical Question

26 Jun


You’re going on a cross-country trip. Airplane, train, bus, or car? (Or something else entirely — bike? Hot air balloon?)

(An excerpt from a second interview with Bam the Gam, by Tabitha Tattler, of the Busy-Body Gazette.)

Mr. Bam the Gam, if you had to travel cross-county, what would you do?

Why, I would take a super-duper waddly-do,

A waddly-do can seat three, one or two.

Don’t you mean, three, two or one?

No, no silly, that’s no fun!

We always put the middle last,

It is a real hoot, so think fast!

What if there is no middle number?

Why, then it is easy as pie;

We line them up side by side.

All will be last, even the first

It will be first-last, not last-first

Okay, but, we don’t have . . . uhm, waddly-dos here?

Oh, well that makes it quite clear.

In that case I’ll take a lomber-loe.

You can drive it with just a toe,

It can stop and slide and goey-go!

It’s the best of all, don’t you know.

But, we don’t have any of those either.

Hmm, well now, that is a teaser.

What do you have to travel by;

Anything that strolls, leaps or flies?

Yes, we have automobiles and planes and trains, to name a few.

Why, what do you know, another three, one and two!

Which is which and which does what and when;

Once I know, I’ll answer, but only then.

Well, an automobile is driven down the road.

Ah, yes, this I’ve been told.

It goes about on only four wheels.

Yes, this might be the one, I feel.

Then there is a plane, it flies in the air.

Flies, you say, way up there?

That would be a lovely way to go,

Up, up and away, don’t you know.

Then  there are trains, which run on rails.

These I’ve seen, like iron trails

Yes, I think this would also be grand

Either will do, by sky or by land.

So then, which of the three would it be?

Why, it does not matter a dot to me

An automobile is nice, so is a train

Then again, I’d be content on a plane

Okay, it sounds as if Bam the Gam cannot make up his mind.

Why, I make up my bed, but never my mind

It works just fine, well, most of the time

But, I still say, if I could pick any two

I’d go with a lomber-loe or a waddly-do.

For more of Bam the Gam see the following two posts:
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Posted by on June 26, 2013 in Daily Prompt


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