Need Help? Yes. Want Help? Uh, Maybe?!

04 Sep


Is it easy for you to ask for help when you need it, or do you prefer to rely only on yourself? Why?

Is this really a yes or no type of question?  Is it really black or white?  Not for me.  I know, shocking isn’t it!  I would have to give, the less than emphatic, answer of: it depends!  I know. Some of you will think this is a cop-out on my part.  Some will accuse me of straddling the fence and not giving an honest, open answer.  

Well, I understand all that; but, quite simply, you are wrong!

Let me try to explain my reasoning.

First, I don’t think there is anything wrong with asking for help.  I’m sure we all know the stereotypical anecdotes about men driving around lost and refusing to stop and ask for directions. There are times when asking for help, asking someone else to assist you is a good thing.  To all the macho, alpha types out there . . . no, it is not always a sign of weakness.

I love learning.  This probably makes me more comfortable in seeking help and advice.  I don’t mind admitting I don’t know something, especially if I can then find it out and add to my knowledge base.  I find learning fun and exciting.  (Yes, I’m one of those types!)  I think it is the highest form of pride not to allow others, more knowledgeable than you or who can look at something from a different perspective, to help and assist you.

Having said this, (yes this is where the proverbial but comes in to play), I do think it is sometimes beneficial to trudge it out on your own.  The best way is not always the path of least resistance.  Sometimes, it is best to struggle, allowing yourself to be tested.  These are growing pains of the mind, character and soul; but, they are invaluable.

The old mantra may serve well here: No pain, no gain.  I know we all love living out that principle; about as much as we love root canals!  But, there is truth to it.  There are times when forcing yourself to come to the solution is well-worth the heartache and stress.

Of course, a wise person will know when which time is which.  When should I simply admit I don’t know, I can’t do this on my own and when should I resolve within myself to persevere?  Again, it is not always black and white.

To muddy the water further, it may even be there are times when a synthesis, a combo approach is needed. We receive a little help on one hand, while doing the bulk of the task on our own.   Life is full of challenges and all sorts of varying scenarios will greet you on life’s path.

To sum up: is it easy for me to ask for help when I need it? Yes.  Do I prefer to rely on myself? Yes.

It is one those classic situations, I like to refer to as an either/and (or a both/or if you prefer)!  Why does it have to be just one or the other?  I think in many cases it doesn’t come down to just one, and only one, option; but, a choice of options.  Some, undoubtedly, are better than others.  But, I feel in most cases, there is enough variance in life to afford many either/and situations and not always the restricting, (and more boring in my opinion) either/or option.


Posted by on September 4, 2013 in Daily Prompt


Tags: , , , ,

5 responses to “Need Help? Yes. Want Help? Uh, Maybe?!

  1. Beth Murray

    September 5, 2013 at 8:10 am

    I have to defend the dreaded “root canal” analogy. Having had them since the age of 14, let me say they have been vastly improved, it no longer takes 3 weeks to get them done at 2 hour intervals. They can be done as quickly as 45 minutes or even 30 minutes, depending on the tooth. I have had them done so quickly that I was not sure they even touch the tooth. Do not fear them, sometimes they are better than a filling. I have a wonderful dentist, he is so great that he gives you Otis Spunkmeyer cookies on the way out the door, I guess to help you develop more cavities which keeps him in business.


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